A Rainy Day in New York Amazon

A Rainy Day in New York, now available on VOD, once stood a chance at never seeing the lite of day. The one-act, which originated at Amazon, was set for release just as allegations of sexual abuse against director Woody Allen began to resurface in the midst of the #MeToo Move. Amazon shelved the film, Allen filed a lawsuit for alienation of contract, and information technology seemed like Rainy Daywas washed for. Well-nigh a year ago, though, Allen was granted U.S. distribution rights, the lawsuit was dismissed, and here we are.

A RAINY Day IN NEW YORK : STREAM IT OR SKIP It?

The Gist: Gatsby Wells (Timothée Chalamet) —and yes, that is really his grapheme's name— is an aimless liberal arts college student with a passion for poker, cigarettes, and his Tucson-bred, girl-of-a-banker girlfriend Ashleigh (Elle Fanning). When Ashleigh gets the opportunity to interview famous filmmaker Roland Pollard (Liev Schreiber) for the school paper, she jumps at the opportunity – because information technology besides ways she'll get to spend the weekend in Manhattan with Gatsby, a New York native. The two set off for the big city and agree to meet up for tiffin reservations after Ashleigh'southward interview with Roland is over. Well, the interview turns into a screening, and the screening turns into a wild goose chase with screenwriter Ted (Jude Police force) afterward a spiraling Roland, who gets drunk and makes a run for it out of the screening room.

Gatsby, meanwhile, has run-ins with old friends all over Manhattan, swings by to run into his brother (Volition Rogers), and avoids letting his female parent know he'south in town so that he's non forced to get to her fancy gala. On his walk effectually the city, Gatsby winds upward on ready of a friend's student picture and pops into a scene reverse Chan (Selena Gomez), the younger sis of an ex-girlfriend of his. The ii get-go bickering immediately, just there's undeniably a spark, and after some other rain-soaked chance come across afterward, the two spend the twenty-four hour period at the Met together. Though he enjoys his fourth dimension with Chan, Gatsby begins to worry about what might have happened to Ashleigh, but now that she'due south had a sense of taste of Hollywood life (and the angel of a dashing moving picture star played past Diego Luna), Gatsby seems to be the last thing on her mind. Shenanigans for both parties only escalate every bit the nighttime goes on, and these 2 split up adventures culminate in realizations that may forever change their human relationship and who they are as people.

A RAINY DAY IN NEW YORK MOVIE — Photo: Everett Collection

What Movies Will It Remind You Of?: A Rainy Day in New York feels similar pretty much every other Woody Allen movie out there. Not much else to compare it to.

Performance Worth Watching: Annaleigh Ashford's fake bad laugh is the only matter worth writing home well-nigh here. Everyone else feels like they are acting in entirely dissimilar movies, and none of them are good.

Memorable Dialogue: The dialogue inA Rainy Twenty-four hour period in New Yorkis dreadful, simply I take to respect the ridiculous on-the-nose-ness of "What the hell is it virtually older guys that seems so highly-seasoned to women?"

Sex and Skin: Like in any Allen pic, there's talk of sexual practice and its significance, just only i scene gets anywhere near sexy (and it'due south because Diego Luna is in it) and Elle Fanning is left stranded in a New York downpour in merely her underwear and a trench coat.

Our Have: If I knew nothing aboutA Rainy Day in New Yorkand you told me information technology was a film student's endeavor at emulating Woody Allen, I would believe y'all. From the moment Gatsby'southward whiny narration begins – and Christ, his name is fucking Gatsby – it's clear we are in for something truly insufferable. I'll admit that I probably began this viewing experience with a bitter gustatory modality in my mouth because of Allen's history, only I'm generally able to milk shake off preconceptions and endeavor to evaluate a story or a operation on its own. With that being said, I tin considerately country that A Rainy Twenty-four hour period in New Yorkis considerately bad.

It checks pretty much every single ane of his boxes – New York, over-talking, melancholy, neuroses, ill-advised relationships, narcissists, misogyny – simply somehow, they're even more middle-whorl inducing this time around. I won't spend too much time criticizing the story – it'southward the kind of wistful mundanity one might look from Allen – because in that location is then much else incorrect here. Like, everything else is wrong here.

The dialogue is and then painfully pretentious and on-the-nose and devoid of all the wit and humour Allen was in one case known for that it'southward near-impossible to engage with what'southward happening. I must have noted a million lines that made me cringe, beginning with a tired diatribe from a 21-year-quondam about how SoHo used to be full of creative people but at present it'due south been commercialized, and they simply get worse from at that place. There also gems like, "I demand a drink. I need a drinkable. I need a cigarette," served to us over narration. The rest of the flick follows adjust.

None of the characters in this movie are likable, non fifty-fifty Elle Fanning, who is unremarkably a pretty charming presence (and that is probable by design – Allen isn't known for treating his female characters kindly). Information technology is genuinely remarkable – and perhaps a testament to some terrible or utterly uninvolved management – that a group of actors of this caliber are this bad hither. I suppose this is what they get for deciding to work with Woody Allen in this climate, but still. It's incredible. All of the scenes between Chalamet and Fanning/Chalamet and Gomez experience like exercises from a high school theater class – I was surprised not to encounter scripts in their dorsum pockets for reference in case they weren't off-book – and those betwixt the more "developed" characters are barely ameliorate. Not even Jude Police force or Cherry Jones can save their scenes. Diego Luna's screentime is just endurable because he is so hot.

A Rainy Twenty-four hours in New York is a sinking ship and in that location are no lifeboats in sight. And no one knows how to swim.

Our Telephone call: SKIP IT. The allegations against Allen lonely should be enough reason to avoid A Rainy Mean solar day in New York, simply even without them, it is a barely watchable matter.

Jade Budowski is a freelance writer with a knack for ruining punchlines and harboring dad-aged celebrity crushes. Follow her on Twitter: @jadebudowski .

Where to StreamA Rainy Mean solar day in New York